Make Parenthood Your Superpower and Achieve Great Things

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Don’t see parenthood as an obstacle in your life. Instead, make parenthood your superpower and achieve great things with it. In this blog post, I’m going to share my growth as a parent and how that maturity allowed me to be even more effective in my life.

“I had no idea how much of my life I had to give up,” a new mom recently confessed to me. 

We all know life changes drastically when we become parents. But just like this mom, we have a vague idea of exactly how our former lives would change.

Here are some of the ways I’ve seen my life change:

• The way I travel now that I have a baby.
• I lose the time to pursue personal hobbies or interests.
• To a large degree, my baby dictates my daily schedule. 
• I cannot go to some of the places I used to go to.
• Going out with my friends has become impractical.
• I am not able to serve in ministry to the capacity I used to.

How has your life changed postpartum? I’m sure you can run a list quite easily. 

These life changes can be depressing. 

Especially since we’ve just gotten used to planning out our own schedules and having a bit of free time (because school and our parents owned us before) to pursue the things we wanted. 

I know that’s how I’ve felt.

Sometimes I wish I could do what I want to do, like before.  

DISCLAIMER: I am in no way saying I don’t want my baby or I don’t want to be a parent. I love my family and I am thankful to God for them. Also, I am not saying that my goals are more important than the high calling and responsibility of being a parent. I wear that badge with pride and I wouldn’t want it any other way. All I am saying is that the above thought passes by each new parents’ mind at some point. 

In going through this phase for a while myself, I want you to know there is a lot of hope!

There are many reasons to be encouraged and to remain positive. 

Instead of daydreaming about ‘the good ole’ days”, make parenthood your superpower and achieve great things. 

Consider the following about parents:

1. Parents are driven more than others. You know you need to provide for your kids and failure is not an option. You know you need to set an example of living a healthy, blameless, and productive life.
2. Parents respect their time more than others. You know your time is limited and so you use it wisely and efficiently. You give up lesser priorities for things that truly matter.
3. Parents know how to sacrifice more than others. You sacrifice every day for your baby. You know how to lay down personal needs for a greater cause. 

God intended this transition to be empowering for you. 

He intends to do amazing things in your children and in your own maturity. 

How do I be the parent God wants me to be?

Be content

The first thing you must do is to accept your circumstances. As Christians, we should remain content in any place God has placed us. We joyfully embrace them as classrooms where we learn to trust God. 

The Apostle Paul is an example of this because he learned to be content in “whatever situation” he was in (Phil. 4:11). 

On the flipside, discontentment comes from pride. It comes from believing you know better than God on how to order your life.

Being content was the first step I took and it was an unbelievably freeing experience. No longer was I feeling anxious about what other things I could be doing or daydreaming about being somewhere else when I was with my daughter. Rather, I was at peace knowing that I was where God wanted me to be.   

Deny yourself 

The second thing you must do is deny yourself. 

I know this can be hard to do. Since high school, we get used to doing things for ourselves. We learn to achieve for ourselves, pursue careers for ourselves, and plan the lifestyle we want. 

But that is not a biblical life. When Jesus calls his disciples, he calls them to “deny themselves, take up their cross, and follow [him]” (Mk. 8:34). The life of a Christian is a life of denying even good things for yourself, in order to get the greatest thing: Jesus. 

And right now Jesus is calling you to be the best parent ever by putting your kids before you. So let go of some of the privileges you once had for the sake of Jesus and your kids.

Love others

The last thing you must do to move through parenthood with grace is to set your sights on loving others. Change your posture from selfishness to selflessness. 

You see before you were afraid that you were missing out on dreams, opportunities, and friendships. But, when we open ourselves up to love freely, we let go of all fear, for “perfect love casts out fear”. (1 John 4:18).

These three movements in my attitude opened my heart to embrace the big changes being a parent made in my life. I felt more at peace and focused upon the responsibilities ahead of me. 

How do I achieve great personal goals as a parent with no time?

In this section, I want to break down how you can still accomplish personal aspirations even though your kids turned your life upside down. 

Decide what is most important to you

Remember: you will always have time for what’s important to you. You can’t do it all anymore, especially with the time commitment of a new parent. But you can still do some.

I found this out the hard way last year when I tried to take on parenting, seminary, blogging, and ministry. I ended up having to drop most things.

Set your sights on 1 or 2 things. Minimize time-wasters such as TV so that you can have time to pursue your personal goals.

Clear time

In this day, nobody has time; everybody is “crazy busy”. The only way to get time is to commit to some things over others. 

Pick hours during the day that are most predictable. I like early in the morning when nobody is up.

At night when the family is resting/asleep or when your baby naps during the day are also great times to take advantage of for your own stuff.   

Make progress – even if it’s just a little.

I learned this from work where I have to tackle large projects over many months. The trick is to widdle away at it day by day. Make progress every day or week – even if it’s 5 minutes. 

Persevere

If you continue little by little over a long period of time, it adds up to a lot! I’ve been learning Greek over the past 2+ years – I do half an hour of practice a day. Though it’s somewhat embarrassing to say I’m still not fluent, I’ve accomplished so much! 

I encourage you to keep at it with the dreams you have and use your status as a parent to motivate you. It’s your superpower. By God’s grace, you can succeed when you accept your first responsibility as a parent and use your spare time to pursue your aspirations. So get to it: make parenthood your superpower and achieve great things!